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Westminster Presbyterian Church
Durham, North Carolina
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"Too
Young?"
A Sermon Preached by Rebecca Mattern
Little did I know when I moved to Durham from Ohio 7 ½ years ago, that I would be standing before you today as your Director of Youth Ministry. I thought that I was joining Westminster for your love and support of youth ministry and mission. What I could not have imagined was that God always had it in mind that you would also be my family and my springboard into discernment of ministry as vocation. You have loved me through difficult times and now are helping me along a new path in my life. I have never been so blessed.
I could go on for an hour about all the ways you have loved me. But I’m here this morning to give you a little bit of insight into how I got to this place and to share my thoughts about youth and my vision for youth ministry at Westminster.
I grew up in the church. I was confirmed a Presbyterian in an inter-denominational church due to the influence of my mom and her Presbyterian best friends. These women would sit around each other’s kitchen tables, debate theology, and talk about their faith. They were Elders and teachers and would argue sermons and decisions made by the church. They did not often shoo the kids out of the room but welcomed us into their conversation. They taught me to think about what I believed, and I wanted to be just like them.
My mom became a Christian Educator and my sisters and I followed her to two churches as she answered God’s call. We moved to the last church when I was in high school. It was here that I started to own my place in the church. I enjoyed youth group and really identified with some of the adult leaders. I loved the senior high youth director, and I served on the planning team for the Synod youth leadership conference (following the good example of my mom and her friends). I invited my school friends to youth group and watched one of them be baptized and join the church. But I did not see ministry as my vocation - instead I wanted to be an engineer, or biologist, or chemist – these were subjects in which I excelled. And so I attended Youngstown State University with an eye to science. During the summers I worked as a counselor at the presbytery’s church camp.
I started to feel like I was being pulled in two directions – I loved being a part of the church, but was not willing to give up the schooling I was good at. The church was paying attention to God’s call in my life, and I was ordained as a Deacon while still in college. Maybe that should have been a sign, because I loved that too, but still I was not giving up my love of science. I made a deal with God: I would stay active in the church, but my vocation was going to be chemistry and biology. So, I graduated with a Combined Science degree - with a minor in religion. I got my first job at a slag plant – testing raw materials and finished products from steel. What I learned most from this job is what people will do to put food on the table – an understanding that every job is important – their’s and mine. I held on tight to that. But God knew it, and I was nominated to serve on a commission of presbytery to examine the gaps that exist between the community and the church. Then I was promoted to the supervisor of the lab. Great! God and I were even. Then our youth director left, and I was asked to fill in part time. Right.
I balanced this insanity for a year before moving to Durham in August of 2000 in search of a better job and more sunshine, but with the same compromise in mind. I was not willing to give up the career that I had worked for and so found a job in a clinical lab in RTP and started looking for a church. Westminster stuck out for me because of your enthusiastic support of youth ministry. I wanted to be a part of this church that sent its youth – not just adults - to work in Princeville and Tarboro, as well as Mexico. I wanted to be a part of the vision and enthusiasm that was coming from the pulpit and moving beyond the walls of Westminster. So I jumped on board and grabbed Paul’s arm – an arm that in the coming years would wrap around me, push me, and lead me. My first retreat was to watch the Leonid meteor showers at Montreat. A night out under the stars with these youth, and a weekend of watching them interact with each other and with Paul, and I was hooked for good. More retreats, summer Montreat youth conferences, mission trips, lock-ins, and Sunday nights in the Youth Suite brought me further into relationship with the youth, sponsors, Paul, and God.
Eventually, the subject of seminary came up with both Haywood and Paul. Oh, no. I like my job in the “real world” and I could never do ministry full time. Nope, I was content, thank you. But the idea stuck in me like a splinter – making me uncomfortably aware of its presence. I was feeling like Jeremiah. Too young, too inexperienced – too scared. But I started to dislike my job and so applied for another –and ended up with a promotion instead. I liked that even less. I was becoming frustrated that my job, which at one time allowed me the time for Westminster, was now keeping me away. I thought, “Surely, God did not keep me in this job to make me hate it? Maybe it is time for me to start thinking about other options. Maybe seminary isn’t such a crazy idea.” But I’m not ready yet. And then Paul got sick and decided to retire. I felt a nudge, and heard a voice, the same voice that spoke to Jeremiah, “don’t be afraid, I’ll be with you.” I started to get the sense that God was calling me to deeper ministry at WPC. I said so out loud, and God’s words to Jeremiah started coming out of your mouths, and haven’t stopped since. And so I know that God is with me as I walk this new path with you and with the youth whom I love.
So, about those youth. They face pressures and challenges just as adults, but without the wisdom that is only obtained with time and experience. They struggle with society's push for individualism, consumerism, and competition. They are encouraged to be individuals that conform, have more possessions than they need, and to be better than the best. In some ways, this has always been the struggle of youth (just as it is the struggle of adults). But today the pressures are greater. For example, our high school sophomores know their class rankings, and a 4.2 GPA doesn’t get them into the top 10% of the class, and may not be good enough to get into the schools of their choosing. In a culture where Christianity is less popular and the world is a much smaller place, fighting these pressures is more difficult than ever, and the role of the church that much more important.
Youth Ministry has many purposes and functions, but the following two stand out for me and will be my main focus for youth ministry at WPC .
The first is to nurture youth into the understanding that they are loved by God, no matter what - if they graduate first or last in their class (go to college or don’t), if they make 1st team All State, or don't make the team at all; if they have four parents or one; if they have a new car, or can't afford new shoes; when they love themselves, and even more so when they don't.
Everyone has had some experience as a youth that was totally deflating. I remember as a high school sophomore getting a lower grade in a class than what I was hoping for. I also remember breaking up with my first boyfriend, my first car accident, being made fun of – for not wearing the right clothes, not having the right haircut or hanging out with a less popular crowd. I remember thinking that I was not good enough at any sport to even try out – and I went to a small school that took just about everyone! These were difficult and formative events for me, and I suspect for many of you, and certainly for today’s youth. My response to them and the support of the people around me have everything to do with who I am now.
It mattered that I had adults in my life, who loved me all the time – even when I was making poor choices and feeling sorry for myself. It mattered that I had church friends I could rely on. It mattered that the church supported me enough to ordain me at a young age. I grew up in an environment of love that was drawn from God – and that is the love I hope our youth can come to know, seek, and give.
That leads me to the 2nd role I see in youth ministry: the guidance of youth in the responsibilities of living a life in Christ – sharing God’s love. Those responsibilities include learning and living the Word by finding and using their gifts, reaching out to those in need, living in community, and honoring God's place and call in their lives. Youth want to know they are making a difference, and they want to practice what they are learning about God and their faith, they want to make it real and they want to share it.
I love Luke’s story about Jesus in the temple. I can just see this young boy, probably oblivious that his parents were a day's journey ahead of him, totally engrossed in the conversation of the elders, and quite possibly annoying them a little with what was likely a constant line of questions. Does this sound familiar? Jesus was developmentally right where he should have been – thinking he knew everything and his parents knew so little. Like Jesus, today’s youth are thinking about what they believe and forming their faith.
Helping youth understand life in Christ means realizing they are not only the future of the church but are also the present. Jesus was in the temple at 12-years-old interacting with the priests and elders - learning and growing. Luke clearly says that Jesus grew in wisdom and strength, he wasn’t born knowing everything. At 14 our youth study and choose to join the church at confirmation. They are active in the church NOW. They serve as lectors, ushers, nursery volunteers, they serve the shelter meal, go on mission trips, serve on the PNC, participate in Bible Study and summer youth conferences, and they show up every Sunday night to explore their faith and how it relates to their experiences. They minister to each other and to the sponsors and they foster friendships that will stay with them for their whole lives.
Youth need to know where to turn when they need help and when they want to rejoice. They are hungry for the fellowship of both their peers and caring adults where they can be themselves without the fear of rejection or the pressure to be the best. They need a place to go when they’ve failed a test, lost a girlfriend, are mad at their parents, or just want to act like a kid. They also want to be challenged in their faith, and they want to serve our Lord. It is the Church community of pastors, trusted adults, and other youth of faith that provide these opportunities and makes all the difference in the lives of today's youth.
How can you be a part of this awesome ministry? Continue on in your support of the youth. Ask them about their week or the last youth event. Include them in your week too. Continue to thank the sponsors who show up faithfully every week to hang out, teach, love, and be loved by the youth. Offer your gifts – whatever they may be. And if you are a youth – same goes to you! Talk to the people on the porch who want to get to know you, it will change both your lives.
“I chose you before you were born. Don’t be afraid, I will be with you.” God’s words to Jeremiah are my comfort and assurance that God is calling me (and has been for a long time) into this ministry and has sent the youth, the sponsors, and the church family to love and support me.
Thanks be to God. Amen.